Emotions pt. 2
Tare at me even more I beg of you, tare at me some more. I plead with you hurt me and call me a liar I plead with you please. Call me a freak call me anything you want, please say your worst. For in the end, it doesn't really matter. I placed my heart on the line and have yet to hear from the people I would consider a friend, that's ok cause this is only the next day...Tare at me, strip me down until there is nothing left I plead...

what I said was true though, and no Cheska you didn't know me for 20 years so you can't speak thinking you did, but hurt me all the same please. No you weren't there when I cried, when I felt so alone every single night, but please continue too think you know me, please continue to destroy me. Yes, I was a nice guy and thank you for thinking so, and yes I am human...Thank you for noticing, yes I do make mistakes...O, sorry, you left that out. Attack me for the mistakes I have made please for I deserve it...Really I do. Yes I lied, yes I cried, I have asked forgiveness and have received none and yet you say I'm the ungodly? But please hurt me more, for I am the disgusting...I am the sick and twisted and yes, although you attack me at every chance please continue to do so because your swaying my heart back to my old self...

I come from a world of pain that YOU DON'T KNOW!!! AND I WILL NOT BACK DOWN BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU THINK!!! You don't know me and you never did...but please, keep telling me you do...

I'm angered and I'm sorry, but please...hurt me more, I ask you to tair me apart as you have been because its working, your making me never want to be the same as I was again so please...cut me down.

I scream out loud and cry at the jabs, only wishing they would stop but please continue to hit harder...I plead for mercy and ley my heart out but please don't hear what I say...I have hurt many before and I will hurt many after, I'm human...don't let that slide...I must be perfect so please whip me into shape. I have changed but please, even though you have yet to actually talk to me even on the phone, you have yet to hear my voice please...take my words and jam them down my neck...

you saw me cry in the back seat of the car, you know I have emotions so please tair at them the most, you obviously where in my mind and knew what I was thinking at the time so please use my thoughts against me too becuase I had sinned the night before, use my sin against me too. Don't leave out any part of this life, this so unperfect life for I am a lier, and a cheat, thank you for alowing me that chance to remember all the things that I am...thank you. I am gratful you care so much for me too tair me down so much thanks.

I am being sarcastic, I am sorry but please use that against me too, don't hold back because I showed a weakness there too...but you don't hate me so I think you. You don't hate me, in fact your a friend...but don't let anything slip my...cut me with the sword of your friendship as well, but where is the line between hate and friendship...I don't know anymore. Use that to distroy what is left of me please...for my emotions mean nothing in this.

If you take joy in all you do, in all you say too me I am glad, for if you wish too have the old Chris back this is the way too do it, to cut me down at every turn and get me to the point of dispair once again...I think you friend. Thank you.
- posted by Kai @ 4/10/2004 09:01:00 p.m.